Consequences
by Pokemon67
Summary: Clary's heart contracted. A picture of Jace's skin glowing as the Heavenly Fire coursed through his veins flashed through her mind. 'Is he okay' There was a pause. Then a whisper, 'No. Clary, I'm sorry, but can you come'


**Me: Beware, reader. Whump fic ahead.**

**Disclaimer: I own not a thing!**

**_TRIGGER WARNING: This story contains descriptions of a person having a seizure_**_. _

_Pokemon67 apologizes for any and all grammar mistakes. And as this story contains research into the symptoms and manifestations of a seizure, she apologizes if she fails in her portal of one accurately. She has never suffered one, but has heard stories and borne witness to one. If there is anything you as a reader notice undeniably wrong in her description, feel free to let her know._

_…__._

Through her closed eyes, Clary could sense the light from the hallway as it cast into her bedroom. She squinted at the dark figure in her doorway. ''Mom?''

''New York City might never sleep,'' Jocelyn said wearily as she shuffled into the room. ''But I do.'' She collapsed on her daughter's bed, handing her her cell phone. ''You left it in my room. It has been ringing for _hours_.''

Clary moved over to make room for her mother. She took the phone. ''Why didn't you give it to me earlier?''

''Hello? Sleeping?'' Jocelyn muttered into her daughter's pillow. ''Why did you leave it in my room?''

Clary glanced at the phone screen. _Izzy calling. _She answered, frowning. ''Hello?''

''Clary! Thank god.''

''Izzy? It's the middle of the night.''

''I know.'' From the girl's voice, Clary could tell something was off.

''Is everything okay?''

''Yeah,'' Isabelle answered in a tone that suggested otherwise. ''It's…um… Jace wanted to talk to you.''

Clary's heart contracted. A picture of Jace's skin glowing as the Heavenly Fire coursed through his veins flashed through her mind. ''Is he okay?''

There was a pause. Then a whisper, ''No. Clary, I'm sorry, but can you come?''

Jocelyn looked up in worry as Clary threw back her covers. She held the phone with her shoulder as she tugged on a sweatshirt. ''What happened?''

''Just…please come.'' Clary was alarmed to hear Isabelle sniff. _She's crying. _''I'll explain when you get here. Oh, crap.''

Clary's stomach leapt into her throat. ''What?''

''Clary?'' Jocelyn asked, seeing her daughter go pale.

Clary ignored her, straining to hear Isabelle. ''Do you have a ride?'' Isabelle asked. Clary sighed in relief.

''Yeah, I'll figure something out. Don't worry. I'll be there soon.'' She grabbed her bag. ''Does Jace want to talk to me?''

Clary heard faint talking as Isabelle asked. There was the sound of arguing. _I didn't force her to come, relax. _Isabelle inhaled deeply before speaking again to Clary. ''No.''

''Does he not want me there?''

Again, Isabelle paused before answering. ''You'll see when you get here.''

Clary nodded numbly to herself. ''Okay. See you soon.'' She hung up the phone.

''Clary?'' Jocelyn asked, sitting up among the blankets. ''Are you okay?''

''That was Isabelle. Something's wrong with Jace.'' Clary turned to the doorway, surprised to see Luke standing there. She hadn't heard him come in. ''Can you drive me?''

Luke looked to Jocelyn. ''I don't mind,'' he said.

Clary looked at her mother as well. ''Please, mom,'' she begged. ''Isabelle wouldn't have called if something wasn't really wrong. Please.''

Jocelyn held up a hand. ''I know,'' she assured Clary. There was a trace of reluctance in her face. ''Sweetie, did she say what? Does he need a doctor or something?''

Clary shook her head. ''She didn't say.'' She bite her lip. ''Please, mom. I'll call as soon as I can.''

Jocelyn sighed and nodded her permission. Clary pulled her shoes on and was out the door with Luke in moments.

Even as Luke sped down the streets on the way to the Institute, Clary felt as if they weren't going fast enough. Her mind kept imagining what she would walk into when she got there, and none of the scenarios were pretty. What would make Isabelle cry and call her multiple times in the middle of the night? It had something to do with Jace. But what? Was the fire hurting him?

Luke tried to pry her for details, but she told him she knew nothing. He left it at that and they rode in silence until they reached the Institute.

Clary unbuckled herself and grabbed her bag from the floor. ''Thank you.''

''Clary.'' Luke studied her. ''I have my phone, your mom has her's. If there is anything wrong-''

''I know. I'll call.'' She leaned over and kissed his cheek. ''See you.''

She ran up through the Church yard gates, bursting into the chapel. Without hesitation she went up the aisles and into the old elevator. Each clunk and clang made her jump.

Clary was still running through scenarios of what was awaiting her in the institute when the doors opened. She walked a few paces down the hallway before seeing Alec. ''Hey!''

Alec turned and paused to let her catch up. His dark eyes were filled with worry. ''Clary, I'm sorry. Izzy shouldn't have-''

''Oh, knock it off.'' This was not the time for Alec to try and push her out. ''I'm here now. What is wrong? Is Jace okay? Are you and Izzy?''

Alec sighed wearily. There was a nervous energy to him as he looked down the hallway where the bedrooms were. ''What did Izzy tell you?''

''Nothing.''

''Nothing?''

''No.'' Clary felt a lump of anxiety lodge in her throat. ''Alec, please, just be honest with me.''

Alec shoved his hands in his pockets. ''It's the Heavenly Fire,'' he admitted. Clary swallowed hard. ''It's burning through him, giving him a fever.''

''He's sick?''

''Yeah, but…'' Alec braced himself. ''When Jace was younger, if he got a high fever, it would cause him to have a seizure.''

''_What?_''

''He's kind of grown out of it. Any time he does get a fever, he always takes something right away. But with the fire in his veins…'' Alec's voice trembled. ''He's heading for one, Clary.''

Clary tried to think of what to say. ''He's out of it right now,'' Alec continued. ''Entirely delusional. I have no idea what his temperature is. Izzy tried touching him and got burned. But he's going to seize, Clary. It's not a pretty sight and I doubt he'd want you to see him like this.'' Alec inhaled sharply. ''I just don't think you should walk in there unprepared.''

Clary managed a nod. ''Izzy said he was asking for me,'' she said.

Alec shook his head. ''Like I said, he's out of it. He thinks he's still with Sebastian.''

Jace, hallucinating that he and her were still trapped with her psychotic brother. ''Do you have any objection to me staying?'' Clary asked.

Alec sighed. ''No. In fact, out of it though he may be, Jace might calm down at the sight of you.''

Clary spread her hands. ''Then it's settled.''

Alec let out another sigh and began walking down the hallway again. ''He's in his room.''

Alec led the way. Jace's door was open and they entered. As always, Jace's room was immaculate, but Clary immediately noticed the unmade bed. The bathroom door was open and Alec wordlessly went to it. Clary followed and was taken aback at the scene that greeted her.

Jace and Isabelle were sitting on the floor. Jace was leaning against the bathtub with his knees pulled up to his chest, staring aimlessly ahead. He was covered in sweat, his hair plastered to his forehead and his t-shirt soaked through. Despite this and the high flush on his cheeks, he was shivering.

Isabelle turned to look as Alec and Clary entered. She nodded in greeting from where she was kneeling next to Jace. ''Hey,'' she said softly.

Clary nodded back. She ventured further into the bathroom and sat down on the opposite side of Jace. ''Jace?'' She called out. She could feel the heart radiating off of him. He didn't seem to hear her. She reached out to touch him.

''Don't,'' Isabelle warned. She held up her bandaged hand. ''It's the Heavenly Fire.''

Clary withdrew her hand. She looked at Jace, who still didn't seem to acknowledge her presence. ''How long has he been like this?'' she asked.

Alec shrugged from the doorway. His gaze didn't wander from his brother. ''He seemed off this morning,'' he said. ''By afternoon he finally admitting to feeling bad. The idiot waited until after our parents left because he didn't want mom to worry. And then this evening…'' he trailed off.

''I heard the water running,'' Isabelle took over. ''For minutes it was running.'' She nodded to the sink and Clary noticed the water splashed on the wall and collecting on the floor. ''I came in and he was standing with his hands under the ice cold water. All he said was 'I think I'm in trouble.' I made him sit down but…'' she used her fingernail to brush some of his hair out of his face. ''Other than occasionally muttering about you and Sebastian, he's been like this ever since.''

Clary felt a horrible lump in her throat. ''And you're sure he's going to seize?''

''This is how it would play out when he was younger,'' Alec said. ''His fever would get really high, he'd shut down, and then seize.'' He sighed. ''We have to get him off the floor and on the bed. He could crack his head on the tile.''

''We can't move him without touching him,'' Isabelle pointed out.

''How about a rune?'' Clary suggested. She pried her eyes away from Jace's shaking form. ''One that's fire resistant?''

''We tried that,'' Isabelle said, pointing to her hand again. ''Heavenly Fire seems to play by different rules.''

''What if I tried making it stronger?'' Clary offered. ''Like, tweaking it?''

''You can do that?''

''I can try.''

Isabelle turned to Alec, who after a moment of contemplation, walked out of sight and reappeared with a stele. He handed it to Clary. ''Go for it.''

Clary took the stele, wrapping it's cold metal around her trembling hands. Isabelle offered her forearm. ''Not that I doubt you, but if it doesn't work I'm already burned.''

Clary protested, but at both Lightwood's insistence, she relented. She knew what the fire rune looked like, but maybe by just changing it a little…

Isabelle flexed her hand when Clary had finished. After the pain from the stele faded, she curled her fingers and touched Jace's cheek hesitantly. ''Well, though he feels like fire, I don't think I'm burned.'' Alec made to grab her hand but she pulled away. ''Don't be stupid,'' she scolded. ''Get marked up.''

Clary quickly repeated the design on Alec and herself. She placed the stele away on the counter.

''Jace, you have to get up,'' Alec said. Jace didn't seem to even see him, despite his brother kneeling right in front of him. ''Come on.''

Alec placed a hand on Jace's arm, but Jace shook him off quickly. ''No,'' he whispered, still not looking at Alec. ''Don't touch me. Don't touch me…''

He trailed off, but Clary had the feeling the comment wasn't directed at Alec. ''Jace,'' she tried. ''Jace, it's us: Izzy, Alec, Clary. You're home, Jace. We're safe.'' Jace still didn't answer, but put his head between his knees. He was rocking. ''Jace…''

She touched his arm as Alec had done, but when he went to shake her off she grabbed his hand. He looked at her for the first time since entering the room, but his glazed over eyes told her he wasn't quite seeing her as she was now. ''Jace,'' she said firmly. ''You have to get up.''

He blinked at her. He made a movement Clary thought was brushing her off, but then she realized he was trying to get to his feet. Isabelle quickly caught his arm before he fell. Alec stood and slung one of Jace's arms over his shoulder and together the two Lightwoods guided their brother out of the bathroom. They did it with an efficiency that made Clary wonder how many times they had had to do it before.

She followed them out of the bathroom. Alec and Isabelle had led Jace over to the bed, which he was sitting on the edge of now. He was breathing heavy. To Clary's alarm, he jerked suddenly.

Isabelle had turned to go back into the bathroom for something and caught her expression. ''It's starting,'' she explained. Clary nodded her understanding as Isabelle brushed past. She forced herself to walk over to Alec, who had sat next to Jace and was fiddling with his watch.

Jace brought his hands to his forehead and moaned. ''Shh,'' Alec soothed, running a hand over his brother's back. Clary noticed the fiddling with his watch had been to set a timer. ''I know.''

Isabelle reemerged from the bathroom with the garbage can and wet cloths. She placed the can on the floor and the cloths on the dresser before kneeling down on the floor. Clary slid down next to her. ''When it happens, what do we do?''

Isabelle looked at Jace's covered face and stood up, taking one of the cloths and using it to wipe his hands. ''Wait for it to be over.''

''While it's happening,'' Alec began. ''We just make sure he doesn't hurt himself, or choke on his spit. The actual seizure shouldn't last more than a minute or two, but the come down period will be longer.''

Clary wanted to ask what the 'come-down-period' would be like, but she figured she would see soon enough.

A few more minutes ticked by, the silence only interrupted by Jace occasionally groaning and Alec soothing him. Isabelle stood back by the side table, her fingers trailing the wood. Clary sat uncomfortably on the floor with her heart pounding in her ears. She was afraid of what they were all waiting for, but longing for it to be over with.

She knew the wait was over when Jace let out a sharp, withering gasp. Alec immediately sprang up, grabbing Jace's head and guiding him down on his side quickly. Isabelle reached over and removed his pillow while Alec clicked the button on his watch. Even though she wasn't looking at it, Clary could see the watch counting down the seconds as the scene folded out in front of her.

Jace's eyes rolled up into his head. He went stiff as a board as he convulsed on the bed. Alec had a hand on his shoulder to keep him in place on his side, presumably so he wouldn't choke on the white foam dripping out of the corner of his mouth that Isabelle was wiping away with a cloth. Clary saw Jace's hands flailing, about to hit Isabelle, and some force within her override the horror of everything that was happening and stepped forward, clasping Jace's hands to keep them still. Or, really just out of the way. Clary vaguely recalled something about never restraining someone while they were having a seizure. Something about bones being able to break because of the person going stiff.

Alec said it was only supposed to last a minute or two. His watch hadn't stopped yet, so Clary knew that the time limit wasn't up, but it certainly felt as if time were dragging on as they all stood around the bed. Clary wondered what happened if Jace's seizure did go over the time limit, what it would mean and how they were supposed to handle it.

Slowly but surely Jace's movements faded. His hands stopped flailing and Clary saw Alec's grip on his shoulder lessen. He went perfectly still, letting out a gasp at the same time as Alec's watch went off.

Isabelle knelt to the floor as she grabbed a fresh cloth. ''Thank god,'' she muttered. Clary numbly watched as Isabelle wiped away more foam that was still dripping out of Jace's mouth.

Alec let out a heavy breath and reached over and felt Jace's forehead. He let out another breath, but this one in relief. ''He's better. Cooler now.''

Clary stroked her thumb against Jace's hands that she was still holding. She was about to ask if the runes were still working when she noticed the faded mark on her own forearm. Sometime during the excitement, the runes had worn off.

Isabelle had run out of cloths. She threw the dirty ones into the trash before getting up and disappearing into the bathroom.

Clary watched Jace's face as his eyes seemed to roll back into place behind his eyelids. He gradually relaxed until it looked like he was sleeping. ''What now?''

''Now,'' Alec said as he sat back down on the bed. ''Now he just sleeps.'' Clary closed her eyes and brought Jace's hands to her face. She could feel Alec watching her. ''You did good.''

Clary managed a shaky laugh. ''I have never been more terrified,'' she admitted in a whisper. She could feel tears in her eyes.

''Welcome to the club.'' Isabelle had reentered, her hands wet and a dry towel in her arms. She folded it and lifted Jace's head a little to slid it underneath, laying it flat so none of the white foam would drip onto the sheets. ''No matter how many times it happens, it doesn't get any less terrifying.''

Clary remembered what Alec had said when she arrived, how they all thought Jace had grown out of it. _It's my fault. I put the Heavenly Fire in him. I caused this. _But this wasn't the time for blaming herself. She could do that later. Right now she could be of use.

She got up and wordlessly exited the room, walking down the corridor halls until she go to the kitchen. Her stomach felt like the size of a peanut and she bet Alec and Isabelle felt the same, but nevertheless she grabbed three sodas and a bottle of water in case Jace woke up before making her way back.

She suspected that nobody would be retiring to their rooms and she was right. Alec met up with her in the hall, caring extra blankets. Isabelle had already claimed the armchair, taking a blanket from Alec and a soda from Clary with a word of thanks before sitting down. Alec went to lay on the window sill and Clary decided to put her small frame to use and lay right at the foot of Jace's bed, her legs just reaching the edge.

While she and Alec were gone, Isabelle had fixed Jace's bed. She had smoothed out his blankets and covered him. He finally looked peaceful, though the fever flush to his cheeks had been replaced with a horrible pallor.

They sat in silence as they drank their drinks, all taking comfort in the sound of Jace's even breathing. After Alec had Clary confirm twice that Jace's forehead was cooler than it had been, he finally turned out the light and they all laid down to sleep.

….

Jace didn't know where he was. He felt hot and there was weird taste in his mouth. Despite his eyes being closed, he was dizzy. The world was spinning, he was spinning…

_We'll be friends, brother dear._

_'__Jonathan Christoper Morgenstern!'_

_Fire. Fire coursing through him. Burning. Burning him up until there was nothing left. Dying. Death._

_Clary. _

''Jace. Shh, it's me.''

He could hear her voice. It made relief spread through his body. He wanted to speak, to open his eyes and look at her, but he didn't have the strength.

''It's okay. I'm here. Alec and Izzy are here. You're okay.''

Jace felt movement behind him. A figure was pushing against his back, tracing her fingers on his check and down his arm. ''It's okay. You're safe. Everyone is safe.''

Jace fought the exhaustion in his body enough to push himself up on his hands to turn over. He forced his eyes open and saw her laying there next to him, trying to blink sleep away. He opened his mouth to say her name, but all that came out was a cough.

She sat up a little. ''Lay back down,'' she whispered. Jace's senses kicked in and he realized Alec was asleep on the window sill. He could hear Isabelle's sleeping breaths behind him. Clary placed a hand on his shoulder and forced him gently back down so he was laying on his stomach.

Jace felt the exhaustion making his eyes want to close. But his mind was slow and trying to grasp onto the reality of what Clary had said before. _Safe. Everyone is safe. _Though it seemed true, his heart pounding in his ears made him feel like it was unlikely. _This is still a dream, _he thought. _I'm still there. Clary's still there. With him, with that bastard…_

Panic began overwhelming him. He felt fire burning through his veins, creeping up to his face. Sweat broke out on his brow. He made a grab for Clary.

She clasped his hand and sat up, pulling his head onto her lap. ''Jace, it's okay,'' she said again. ''Everything's okay. You had a seizure but it's over.''

So that explained the taste and dizziness. Knowing he had had a seizure made some of Jace's panic fade. Now he could vaguely recall early during the day, the feeling of deja vu he had that morning, the disorientation, the stumbling around. He hadn't had a seizure in years. He had almost forgotten how debilitating one could be.

Clary began running her fingers through his hair, gently rocking back and forth. He could hear her speaking, telling him everything was fine. He mustered the strength to sit up just enough to move out of her grasp before pulling her down next to him so she was laying beside him again.

Jace collapsed onto the mattress again, his eyes sliding shut without his permission. He had to gasp for breath even from that small moment. The dizziness started up again, and with it the panic came. But Clary was still next to him, murmuring gently.

''Shh, it's okay. Just go back to sleep, Jace. Everything's alright.''

Jace pushed down the panic and followed her voice, reveling in the coolness of her touch as she stroked his cheek. Slowly the dizziness and fear faded as he fell back asleep.

….

Alec slept lightly. He woke up a least once every hour just to gaze around the room and make sure everything was alright. Jace had woken up once, but Clary had moved next to him and urged him back to sleep.

Alec knew when they had met Clary he hadn't greeted her with open arms. There was some part of him that had resented this mundane girl for trying to break into the Shadowhunter world, and then he resented her more for doing so successfully. It wasn't even that Jace had so obviously loved her earlier on (even thought Alec admitted that was a large part of it) but that in less than a week this stranger managed to intrude on his family. Growing up in an Institute, exiled from Idris, Alec was used to being close to his siblings. Having to share them with a mundane wasn't something he took kindly to.

He supposed Clary and him had come a long way. He no longer felt the urge to hit her, and he didn't take to much pleasure in correcting her when she was wrong, or take pride in the fact he knew more about Shadowhunting than her (at least, he was working on it). There were even times he enjoyed her company. And though it certainly felt like their lives got a hell of a lot more complicated since meeting her, Alec was glad she was around. Especially tonight.

Being the oldest sibling, you had to look out for your younger siblings. These younger siblings tended to hate this implication, especially if you weren't _that _much older. If Alec had a nickel for every time Isabelle said 'Yes, that two year gap is really _insurmountable_, isn't it?' he could probably buy a boat. Having the backup of your siblings' friend could really help.

Tonight, when Alec realized how bad Jace was, he had been scared. Logically, he knew there was a protocol to follow. Emotionally, he wanted to freak out and panic because _god he wasn't good at this. _As much as a older sibling was supposed to take care of things, Alec lived in fear of failing. After all, hadn't he failed with Max?

But then Clary came in. Overwhelmed, freaked out of her mind, but doing her best to remain calm and wait for instructions. She had looked to Alec and Isabelle for how to help and the thought that this short red head who at times never seemed to give a damn about how she acted was willing to follow Alec's lead gave Alec the reminder that no matter what he felt, he needed to act. Clary had a way of looking at a person not as if she were daring you to fail, but daring you to give one good reason why you couldn't do anything.

Alec remembered when he was a child, how he thought growing up and becoming an adult would make him feel sure of himself and he could carry himself with poise and assurance like his parents did. Now though he wondered if the phrase 'fake it till you make it' was more applicable then he realized.

The sun was starting to rise, casting a soft yellow light into the room. Alec saw Clary carefully sit up from behind Jace and slip back to the foot of the bed. He wondered how long she had been awake. ''You alright?''

She seemed surprised that he was up. ''Yeah,'' she said. She got off the bed and looked at the rising sun. ''I should go home. My mom is probably worried.''

''You sure you don't want to just call her?''

Clary shook her head. ''No. I just need to…''

She trailed off, but Alec understood. Clary's face was tight with unshed tears. Watching your boyfriend go through what Jace went though was hard. Even thought they were Shadowhunters and were prepared to deal with fights and injuries, it was quite something else altogether to have a condition which you couldn't do anything about. Alec wondered if that was part of the reason Shadowhunters didn't have any terms for mental illnesses and such; in a world of angels and demons, it was to hard to admit that there were still some things that couldn't be explained.

As Alec watched Clary gather her bag, he wondered if it had been selfish of them to ask her to come. He discarded the thought as he remembered what Isabelle told him of when Jocelyn reunited with her daughter: _Knowing is always better than not knowing._

''Do you need money for a cab?''

''No, I'll walk.''

''You're sure?''

''Yeah.'' She managed a smile. ''Bye.'' She paused to give Jace a small kiss on his forehead before quietly slipping out.

_…__._

Clary walked home. Even though it was the early hours of the morning, the city was still teaming with life; Some people hurrying to work, some from work, morning people out for runs, night owls trudging home for sleep. It gave Clary a strange feeling of belonging. She was just another person in the crowd with her own thoughts and problems like anyone else.

_How many people here caused their problems?_

Clary wanted to cry but felt like she didn't deserve to. She had caused Jace to suffer in so many ways- last night was just the tip of the iceberg. The Heavenly Fire entered his veins by her hand and that was why he was hurting. It was her fault that Jace had had a seizure. It was because of her that Isabelle and Alec had been terrified for their brother.

_I'll never forgive myself. Never._

**Me: I am on a Mortal Instruments writing kick right now and am pretty pleased with this story. I hope you enjoyed. If you can, please take the time to review. It would mean so much to me.**

**Happy Writing! **


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